Can I Let You Go
by CanadianStinbatskys
Summary: Robin lets Barney go because she sees that he isn't happy with her traveling all the time for work. But she can't let him go because she hasn't told him the things she's always wanted to tell him. Will he take her back after her confessions? Future fic!
1. What Am I Doing?

This should be a one shot but I wanted to write a story that would explain why Robin let Barney go. However, she regrets it right away because the Robin Scherbatsky that I knew and love would never let Barney go because of selfish reasons. This would fit with the character developments of both Robin and Barney but this is more of a Robin story. I'm dealing with the Robin part of her POV because she needs to explain a lot of her actions and why she does what she does. She loves too hard and can't let go of Barney and never will. Will Barney take her back and how will she explain to him that she made a decision she regrets making. Also, later there will be some gang interaction but with Marshall and Lily in Italy they all aren't together anymore to have face to face interactions. And, she'll also will have the long talk with Barney that she never had with him on the show. In chapter 2 that is!

I hope you enjoy this one I have so much built up anger with this show now and it's never going away.

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She can't fight the feeling that every time she closes her eyes he comes to her mind. She tosses and turns the night after he leaves her. She tells herself it was for a good reason, that the divorce was the right thing for the both of them. When she reads a text message on her phone the next morning it all comes back to her and the tears begin again.

_I love you Robin but I just can't have you pick between me and your career. Thanks for loving me, you made me see that someone like me can be loved and I am grateful to you for being that person in my life. I see now that I can move on with my life because even though I thought we can work, I know we can't. Your career will bring you to wherever you want to go but for me I have to stay in New York. Marrying you was the best and smartest decision I ever made and you made me so happy. Happier than anyone has ever, you are my best friend, my best bro and the woman I wanted to share my life with. So, goodbye for now I hope to see you again but I just can't see you cause it hurts too much. I hope you read this by the time I get on my plane. I love you and wish you all the best in the future._

The tears keep coming and soon she feels a rush of something in her stomach. She runs to the bathroom and throws up, she doesn't know what this feeling is but all she knew is that her body just couldn't take anymore heartbreak. Laying on the bathroom floor next to the toilet, she had thrown up four times in the last fifteen minutes it was hopeless when she tried to get up from the floor so she lays down on the rug with her head looking at the sealing. She was still in the hotel in Argentina, thinking about what just happened to her, her whole life flashing before her eyes as she closes them again still laying on the floor.

"Do you want out Barney?" She asks her husband of only three years and hoped it wasn't going to be what she thought was coming next.

"I love you but." He pauses trying to not look directly in her eyes. "I can't do this anymore, your job is clearly more important to you than I am. I get that you love your job but I also know that when I married you I was marrying your career too. So I'm giving you this out because I can see you aren't happy." Those are the last words he had spoke to her and the last thing she remembers.

The tears come again as she opens her eyes still laying on the floor of the bathroom. "Nooooo" she screams out hitting the cold floor beside her with her hand. "I lost him again because of my selfishness, I put my career ahead of him, why do I have to be so selfish and only think of myself all the time. He left me again because he thought I was unhappy and didn't care enough about him to put him first. God, I love this man more than I thought I could love anything or anyone and I gave him the out hoping he wouldn't take it. But he did and now I'm here laying on the floor crying cause I messed up the one thing I've always wanted." She sits up on the floor where she remained a few minutes later rubbing her swollen eyes then standing up.

"God how did I get here again?" She asks herself looking at her reflection in the mirror.

She's so messed up, god she thought she had it all when she finally told herself to stop running from Barney and she meant it then. But, now. How did that all go away? She married him three years ago and that was the best decision she has ever made then. The way Barney loved her and put her wants and needs before his own made her feel something that she had never felt before and she knew in her heart when she asks him for an out that he would say no and they will be fine cause they would work out their problems. She even wanted to ask him to stay and try to work it out but the selfish part of her thought it would be easier to let him go. It wasn't and now only 24 hours later she's staring at her image in the mirror after having a breakdown. How. No why did she ask him that word? OUT: she now hates this word it's nagging her mind, it's eating at her brain, it's weighing down her heart and causing her stomach to do weird things. This word is the worst word she ever heard. It's the word she did not want to hear coming from his mouth. But she did hear it and now she regrets giving him that out.

She thought she could do this alone, she was already independent. That's what she knew about herself and what Barney loved about her but letting him go without telling him what she needed to tell him. No, what she wanted to tell him but now she can't cause he's gone and she threw away the one thing she needed in her life.

After a half hour just staring at her reflection in the bathroom mirror she splashes some cold water on her face then dries it with a towel then leaves the bathroom. As she steps back into the main room of the hotel she looks around noticing that all of Barney's things are gone. He left her, it was the one thing she was terrified of, she ran for so long trying to fight her feelings for him but then he asked her to marry him and she couldn't say no. It's the only thing in her life that she thought could last forever. The one and only man in her life who loved her for HER which meant loving her for being her independent self and for following her dreams. Or, at least she thought supported her career. Maybe the reason he left her was because he thought she wanted her independence back. Maybe she was smothering him or maybe he thought she was unhappy and dragging him all over the world wasn't something he wanted when they married. She got that part but why did he take the out and not say he didn't want to? That's the question she can't help but think about right now.

Did she make the right decision letter him go? No. Was she too scared of the answer he would give next? Yes. Does she regret trying to fix and work out their problems? Yes. Did she do the right thing letting the love of her life go just like that without telling him not to leave her? She told herself yesterday that she did but now that answer is no. She thought she could do this on her own, she thought he'd understand, she wanted him to fight for her, she wanted to fight for him but she was too scared that they wouldn't get passed this.

She liked her new job as foreign correspondent and traveling like she always dreamed of. But that was before she knew that she couldn't live without Barney and accepted to marry him. And now she's alone again sitting on the hotels bed twisting her wedding band between her fingers. She couldn't bring herself to take the ring off until this moment. But it was only for a second before she put it back on her left hand.

"Damn it, I really screwed up again why do I do this? No wonder my father has always been disappointed with me. I can't do anything right. I lost the love of my life for being a coward and not fighting for him... For us, like I should have along time ago. I should have settled down with him when we first dated. God, I knew it then and I knows it now. I love Barney Stinson and will never stop, how can one man do this to me. How can I let him go again when I wanted to be with him forever?" And the tears starts again and she takes off her ring again and throws it across the room where it landed by the trash can, she wanted to throw it inside the can but it didn't land there.

The next thing she knew she was packing up her suitcases and calling her boss telling her he needs to go back to New York. She can't do this job anymore. She leaves the hotel and checks out and hops on the next plane back to where her home is and where her heart lies.


	2. I Can Make This Work

Warning/AN: This might be a little sad for a while I hope you still read this. Barney and Robin will have a lot of problems before they can solve their problems. I love happy BR but I love Robin fighting for Barney even more than that so this is what this fic is about.

* * *

"Barney please pick up your phone." Robin hoped that Barney would be home and called him once she landed in New York at the airport. She wanted to smooth things over with him and tell him she made a mistake letting him go again.

She ran outside to a cab which she took to Barney's apartment which is still their apartment because her stuff was still there and they are still living together. This divorce was so sudden and quick, she'd never thought the day she married Barney she would lose him again so quickly. Three years to be exact. She couldn't let herself (her heart) let him go without talking to him. Telling him all the things she's been holding back for so long even when she married him. She hoped that he would listen to her when she tells him she made a mistake not fighting for their marriage.

The cab pulls up in front of Barney's (their) building and she throws some money at the driver bolting out the car and inside the lobby of the building. "I need you to be there Barney." She mutters to herself as she walked into the elevator. She let the elevator doors close after her and then leaned against the back of the elevator hoping that Barney is home. The elevator pings to a stop and the doors open on Barney's (their) floor. As she exits the elevator, she becomes nervous, her hands start shaking and her knees seem to not hold her legs in place but she walks quickly to the door and doesn't hesitate to knock on the door.

Thank goodness Barney was home and the relief on her face when he opened the front door made her face turn from a frown to a hopeful smile. "Thank god, I thought you wouldn't be here when I got here but you are." She says the first thing that comes to her as he looks at her with a happy smile and those gorgeous blue eyes that made her fall so deeply in love with him.

"Of course I'm here. It's my apartment Robin." He says sarcastically shaking his head but still keeping his smile on his face.

"I-I need to talk to you and it's very important." Robin started to say but was cut off by Barney grabbing her hand and bringing her inside the apartment.

"Wait, what are you doing here anyway? Aren't you supposed to be working in Argentina?" Barney asks confused by why Robin showed up without a call or text.

"Yes, I was supposed to be... But I-I'm not. I" she leans her head down looking at the floor sadly. "I quit my job." She tells him after a second of trying to not lie to him like they promised each other on their wedding day.

"You quit? Why would you quit? I thought you job was important to you." Barney was even more confused on why Robin left her job because he thought that her career and being a foreign correspondent was her dream. It's the reason he let her go. Divorcing her was sad, it was something he never wanted once he married her. But, if Robin's here and not in Argentina does this mean she wants something or is she just here to make him reminded of their last interaction? Cause seeing her again breaks his heart even more.

"I." She brushes past Barney to sit down on the couch. They had been standing motionless at the stoop of the door but was still talking just without movement. "Quit because I." The next word is hard for her to mention but she will. "When you told me you wanted an _out_ of our marriage I thought I wanted that _out_ but now..." She looks away not looking at him because this is too much for her to take and too much for her to say. "But, now I don't. God, I was so scared that I was losing you so I asked you if you wanted out because I saw that you were unhappy living on the road and dragging you with me isn't what I wanted. But, when you told me you can't do this anymore and left without another word. I was going to ask you to not take it but something was telling me to let you go. So I did and now I regret it." She still can't meet his eyes so she looks the other way not knowing what Barney will say or do about hearing this from her.

"Robin..." He begins with a light smile on his face "look at me." She turns and looks at her, the first thing she sees is a half frowned smile on his lips looking at her with those darn blue eyes. God, how can one man do this to her, only one look at her and she's weak again.

"I." He can't believe she's here sitting next to him in their apartment telling him she made a mistake letting him go. "I can't believe you quit your job and came here. It's crazy, you should be doing what you love doing which is your job." he can't believe her it's crazy that she just opted to leave her job when she loved it so much.

"I loved being a foreign correspondent but... I don't love love it. I love traveling but I don't love being without you." She looks away from his gaze with tears starting to flow down her face.

"Are you saying you want to stay here in the city and work on our marriage?" He asks her knowing that, it's exactly what he wants to hear from her but doesn't like that she quit her job for him.

"Yes." She finally says wiping her teary face and looking directly in his beautiful blue eyes that make her melt every time she looks at them. At him, she never should've let him go without fighting for him like she did before they got engaged. Okay, it was all a ploy by Barney but she loved that he did that because it showed her how much he loved her and wanted to be with her. It also opened her eyes to see that she loved him too. She always did. When they broke up the first time it was for the best because it reminded them both that they still cared and had strong feelings for each other and that their chemistry and love would never go away.

"I don't know Robin. I love you. I always have, you are the love of my life. But. I can't let you just quit the job you loved doing and all the traveling you wanted to do for me." He wants to keep their marriage going and their divorce from being finalized but he can't let her do that for him.

"And, you are the love of mine. I thought when I was just getting started in the business that I didn't need anyone to help me or guide me. I didn't need a man in my life because I was shown when I was growing up to not depend on any man because my mother told me not to. But, you. You are different, you showed me that I can have a career and a man in my life and I don't have to pick between anything. I can be with you and still work. The network is promoting me to co-vise President of World Wide News. When I told him I couldn't do the foreign correspondent position he told me about this opening. The current president in stepping down next week and they've been looking for someone to stay in New York and operate the studio and the network. So, I told them that I'll take the job right away." This is shocking, Barney's at a loss of words he can't believe Robin would leave something she always wanted to do. But, hearing this new news was really amazing.

"I really can't believe what I'm hearing right now." It's great that she did this for their relationship but he still can't bring himself to let her do this when he only wants her to succeed in her field like she told him many times over the years.

"Don't you want to live your dream of traveling and seeing different places. I thought you always wanted that, I knew you always wanted that but to have you do all this for me. I just don't know if I'm willing to let your dreams go just so we can be together. I love you, that's never been not a lie but to have you do this for me. I'm sorry, Robin I can't let you do this for me. I married you because of how amazing and independent you are and knew that you love your independence just as much as I like my own. So, even though I love you more than anything we can't get back together. At least not right now, I know this new position of yours will take up more of your time which would leave no time for US." He knew this was bad, telling her this but he just can't be with her without the repercussions of her job.

Robin couldn't believe he just said this, she hoped that they can save their marriage when she came here. She loves him so much more than her job, that's why she quit that gig around the world. She wanted to do something right for once and save the only thing that mattered to her. Her job isn't that important. Barney is.

After leaving the apartment in tears she calls Lily to see if she can come over. Lily was busy that afternoon but later that night they meet up.

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AN: This is a story of how Robin wins Barney back not the story of how Barney wins her back again. So, we won't have a happy ending just yet. FYI, my stories always have happy endings so keep reading cause there will be some hurdles to jump over until Robin knows what she wants to do. In the next chapter Lily and Robin will talk and Marshall and Barney will talk with them both (B/R) getting advice from them. Marshall and Lily also are traveling a lot for Lily's work but are currently in NY in a new home and Lily is not pregnant again in this story. M/L have two children who are being raised in NY but Marshall is taking care of them and is also a judge part-time. And, Ted and Tracy are married and living in their house in Westchester.


	3. Conversations and Realization

I thought it would be nice for Robin to get some much needed advice from Lily. I hated not having enough of them in the final season and the last episode was just too painful to count as a good friendship scene(s). I also like that Barney would go to Marshall for relationship advice and for them two hang out without Ted, I believe their friendship was much more interesting than Marshall's friendship with Ted or Barney's (one sided friendship with Ted) so enjoy this chapter there isn't much drama here.

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After Robin left, Barney felt bad for not taking her back when she came to him wanting to work on their relationship. He did want to work things out with her, he loves her and that's never been not true. He always knew when he married her, that she'll still have her career to take seriously. He also knew that since they tried to make their relationship work they would both have to compromise Robin did not and now they are separately from each other. They knew full well how strong their respect and mutual understanding was for one another. Loving her was an easy way for him to finally see something he wanted so badly in a new light. He knew she was always stubborn and selfish but when it came to each other, they always, always understood their independent nature. Robin was strong and wanted to be a big success in journalism. Her life goals was to become a famous world wide journalist who everybody knew and wanted to be. That never panned out for her, she loved her job but that wasn't always something she needed in her life.

"Marshall I need to ask you something and don't joke about this because I'm straight up serious." Barney and Marshall decided to meet every Sunday to catch up on what they been up to. Since Ted was no longer in the city the two guys made sometime to meet and chat about their lives. They missed Ted but it's their way of just being bros without the third bro around. So, every Sunday they meet in one of the two guys apartments but this Sunday they're at Maclarens.

"Okay, ask away." Marshall replied putting down his beer on the table in front of him.

"Robin and I have been going through somethings. We've decided to end our marriage." This shocked Marshall, it was a very shocking thing to hear from Barney because he thought that they were happy.

"Why?" Marshall spat out shockingly giving Barney this 'wow' face.

"She has been focused on her job, she never has anytime for me or for our relationship anymore. I told myself it was just me being petty about her choosing her career over me and our marriage. I knew when I married her I would be marrying her career too. But I didn't know that it would take over her life more than our relationship." Barney confesses that he knows Robin loves her career and her success but he didn't know that her career would be more important than him.

"I get that. Since I've been in the seat I can't think of a time when I'm not busy for Lily. And, now that Lily's been working a lot more for The Captain I haven't seen her enough to have the time for us. You know, a relationship takes compromise and heard work but it doesn't mean you can't work it out." Marshal and Lily have had some recently relationship problems. They have both been working a lot, with two kids and their careers they barely have time for _them _anymore. It's becoming a bigger problem but they try and make time to see each other without their kids and work schedules.

"So, after I left Argentina I regretted leaving Robin. But, the problem was. She didn't want to compromise on working versus our relationship. She came to me early this morning only 30 hours after I left to tell me she wants to work on our relationship and make it work. She said she is now staying in the city and taking a new job a Co-President of World Wide News, which would take up more of her time and not give our relationship the time it needs. Just like when she chose to stay in Argentina and end our marriage."

"Wait, if you just got a divorce that means your marriage is still legal. You can try to save your marriage be ending the divorce." Marshall explains with a light smile on his lips. He doesn't want to see his friends divorce because of some problems. He knows they can work it out, being together, having Lily in his life makes his days more wonderful. He can't see why Barney still wants a divorce, if Robin's serious about working on their relationship they can still save their marriage.

"I know, it doesn't become legal for another month. We rushed it but since we were in Argentina for 2 weeks we have yet to finalize the papers. Since we have nothing and no pre-nup which I never wanted anyway. I signed my half of the papers but she hasn't yet." This is interesting, Marshall thinks if Barney and Robin try to talk and communicate better with each other that they can fight for their marriage.

"So, maybe you two should work it out and not file the divorce papers yet. You can still be married, but just separated for a bit while Robin figures out what she wants." Barney knew that once those papers are filed their marriage would be over. This is something he doesn't want, he wants to stay married because having her as his wife is the only thing he's ever wanted.

Robin called Lily the moment she left Barney's building. She hoped they can meet and talk, Lily responded with _I'm working and busy right now maybe tomorrow? _With a text reply Robin tells her okay, tomorrow's fine. They meet up the next day at a cafe near World Wide News.

"It's been so long since I've seen you Robin hows' it been?" Lily kisses her friends cheek as they sit down in chairs with their coffees.

"Not so great. I have been working and traveling a lot. But, that's not why I wanted to see you." Robin takes a sip of her iced latte and then begins to explain to Lily what's really going on in her life.

"Wow, you mean you're divorced? How could that be? You were supposed to have worked out, you seemed ready to be married on the weekend of your wedding. Why would you throw that away so quickly Robin?" Lily was shocked, she knew her two best friends were happy and ready to marry each other, they worked so hard to try and be together what the heck happened between 2013 and 2016? She asks herself wondering why her two idiot friends can't make their relationship/marriage work.

"Not legally but yes." Robin sadly looks at her coffee and then back up to her friend. "We have a divorce waiting in the wings, but I haven't signed the papers yet. I can't bring myself to sign them, I made a mistake choosing work over him and our marriage. I told myself the day we married that I will spend less time being selfish and for once put someone else's needs before my own. And, now I can lose the only man who respects my independent mind. I love Barney, I want to try and save our marriage so I told him yesterday that I regret letting him leave. I want to try and win him back and tried to yesterday. But, he doesn't want to work this out and he said that he loves me but can't let me chose him over my job." Lily realizes now that Robin wants to save her marriage but also thinks maybe Barney's right and they should have some time apart until they are in a place where they can make their relationship work.

"Maybe you should give Barney sometime because you seem to think working more is the answer you need to work on your marriage. I understand coming back here and staying in New York was a good idea cause I miss seeing you. But, taking another job when it could take up more of your time... Let Barney have sometime to himself and you should really think about what you really want." Lily's right, damn she's always right. Robin hates that about Lily but she is and even though she wants Barney back and for him to understand she needs to take sometime to look at herself and find out what she wants.

After their lunch date Robin walked back to the hotel she's been staying in and took a cold shower. It was a hot summer day and she's been sweating since she left lunch. She strips off her clothes and enters the shower. Standing under the cold wet water, she thinks about lunch with Lily, her conversation with Barney and everything she's been thinking and hoping for the last three days. She realizes that she can't force Barney to take her back when she thinks he might need more time. She thinks that Lily was right in saying this to her, she now realizes that she does love her job but loves Barney more and maybe letting him go was a good thing. She understands that her work does always seem to take over her mind and letting Barney go back to New York was the right thing to do.

She closes the faucet and takes the towel off the rack beside the tub, steps out onto the rug and wraps her body into the towel. She walks over to the sink where she looks at her reflection in the mirror before her, just like the night Barney left her. Looking at her reflection just like that night made her feel more better about everything. The light is clear, she knows what she has to do to now... Let Barney have sometime to himself and focus on her new position at work. She doesn't know if she can take this new job opportunity, it's a great opportunity but she doesn't know if she can take this job. The hours traveling was stressful enough and it put an end to their marriage. Or, more so let Barney leave her over her not being around enough. She knows now that she can have love and her career but needs to focus on what she knows... The work she's been doing recently has been great so focusing on that is a good start. She isn't leaving New York again, she loves the city and loves seeing Lily and Marshall. Meeting Lily today was great and she gave her the best advice which helped clear her mind about everything that's happened.


	4. The Timing Is Not Right Yet

The last chapter wasn't exactly how I wanted that to go. Chapter 3 was supposed to be different but it does go with the story, I should have made that chapter for a later chapter. The next couple of chapters will focus on Robin's career and Barney's new found success as an online banker through GNB. Barney is also running his own daily questions and answers blog and the blog name is LEGENDARY ADVICE. He updates everyday when he gets the chance. I also want to focus on the Stinson family and Barney telling his family that he and Robin are divorcing.

Long chapter!

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Robin calls Barney the day after she talks to Lily to tell him she's going to go pick up all of her personal items.

* * *

"Soooo. That should be everything." Robin is packing up her things as Barney looked on sadly.

"Yep, I can't believe this is over." Barney says sadly looking down at the floor. He knew this has to be, but he hated letting Robin go. He wanted to tell her to stay, that he regrets now giving up on her but he doesn't. He just stands there sadly trying to avoid eye contact. God this hurts him more than he though, losing Robin was one of his worst fears and now that they are about to get divorced it's all sinking in. He wants to cry or punch a wall or just run, crab her and kiss her. He does neither!

She's been holding back tears for the last 10 minutes hoping upon hope that he changes his mind or she won't be a coward and leave. She so doesn't want to leave, she wants to stay. Tell him that she was wrong and that she wants to work things out. She did come back for him, quitting her job for him it was one of the most pressuring things she's ever done and only three years into their marriage she's already taking the easy way _out _when that's the last thing she wants to do. She still loves him, always has and always will but her brain is telling her it's time to leave or her heart will give in and she'll kiss him until they're both lying in his (our) bed. Ugh, that king sized comfortable best-night-sleep-bed they bed she had wonderful dreams in. The bed where she thought she would spend every morning in waking up next to Barney and going to sleep in every night. Kissing him good morning and good night and the legendary sex they had and could have had for many many years and decades. She wanted to spend her whole life with him. She thought once they're married they'll have it all (all meaning each other because that's the only thing both wanted) but now. Now she's packed up her things and is about to walk out of the fortress for the very last time.

Barney walks Robin to the front door. "I." Barney starts to say something, he wants to tell her to stay. Take each of her bags and bring them back into the bedroom and then crab her a kiss her until they couldn't leave each other. But, this has to be. At least for now anyway. As much as it hurts it needs to be. "So are you taking that promotion?" Barney asked not knowing if Robin really wants to take on such a big news station at such a young age because it would be a lot more pressure for her to take and a lot more of her time.

"Yes, I'm thinking of it. I'm meeting with the current Vise-President tomorrow morning." This was an unexpected question to ask, she thought Barney was going to say something else which he was but she didn't have to know that.

"Cool, I just want you to know that whatever you do and wherever you go you will always be... "Legen" "Legendary" She finishes smiling lightly back at him.

"I know, I got to go." Robin wanted to kiss him on the cheek but that would be too intimate. The fact is, anytime her lips makes contact with Barney she feels this weird tingly sensation in her stomach it was like getting sucked into a well or being pinched in the stomach. It was that instantly feeling of happiness, anytime she's around him she feels that connection, that never-goes-away feeling of wanting and needing him. This never ends, it keeps going until her mind bursts and her heart goes awry.

They stand there for a moment until Barney says "bye, and good luck tomorrow." He tells her locking the door behind her. Robin stands by the elevator waiting for it to arrive on the floor. She looks back at the door not too far away from where she stands and her eyes start to get blurry. This is real, this is happening, I actually left him when I still wanted to try and work things out. She already regrets not saying anything or doing something about it but she doesn't do a thing and when the elevator stops at Barney's floor she enters it letting the doors close behind her. She stands at the side of the elevator letting her luggage go from her hands.

* * *

"This really happened." She says as she starts to have a breakdown in the elevator. Lucky for her there was nobody inside it to see her break down in heavy flowing tears or bang her hand against the wall so hard she could feel it tingling from hitting the wall.

When Robin finally left, Barney instantly regretted letting her leave without telling her to stay and that he wants to be with her and not get divorced because that's the last thing he ever wanted. Divorcing Robin, even putting her name on those damn papers makes him want to take his huge TV off the wall and throw it off the balcony. But, he doesn't and instead he gets a glass out of the cupboard to fill it with scotch cause right now he can't be sober. He needs to be so drunk that it'll erase the last couple of months cause it really happened. Robin left him for good and he was too scared to ask her to stay because he was afraid of the answer.

The elevator stopped at the main floors lobby. Robin tries to fix herself up and dry her eyes before the elevator opens but it was no use cause the doors opened to people witnessing the mess she just was in. She didn't care though, she moved passed them and out into the lobby.

"Oh, Mrs. Stinson." That name, she had changed her name the moment she was married because being a Stinson means being with Barney for the rest of her life. Plus Scherbatsky is really hard to spell.

"Yes?" She said bracing herself to look at Larry who's the building security guard.

"I'm sorry, are you okay?" Larry asks worried giving Robin that look she always hated on people. You know? That pity look that says I'm oh so sorry.

"Yes, I'm fine." Robin brushes her hair out of her face and looks up at the nice man before her.

"Oh, okay. Do you want me to get you something. A cab or car?" Larry asked not wanting to ask why Robin was crying although he sees she was but it's not his place to ask why.

"Yes. That will be nice thanks Larry." She smiles lightly trying not to show her pain through her fake and sad smile.

Robin waits for a cab outside the building and has a brief but nice conversation with Larry. She doesn't tell him what happened and that she and Barney are getting a divorce. And he doesn't ask why she was crying but they talk about her new job opportunity and Larry wanting to retire.

"You know, it's not always a good thing to just have a job." Larry tells her after she talks about her promotion.

"Oh, why?" She asks him wanting to know why Larry thinks a job isn't everything you need in your life.

"Because it isn't everything. It's only money to make your life easier, but money isn't everything with especially when you have a family, loved one(s), or even a personal life. It's just money, you have to make money but you don't need it in your life. A job is just way for people to get money for their everyday lives it doesn't make you complete." With those words, a cab pulled up in front of the building and Larry helps Robin put her luggage in the trunk.

"Thank you Lar. You are a great man." She tells him giving him a sweet kiss on his cheek and giving him a tip for being so nice to her and getting her a cab.

"Have a good day Mrs. Stinson." "Please, call me Robin." She still can't say that name without bursting into tears it's something she's been doing since Barney left her two weeks ago.

"Robin. Take care now." Larry says with a smile closing the cab door after Robin gets inside.

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Barney has drank three scotches and one bottle of Gin before stopping and going into his bedroom. It's only been two minutes since Robin left and the only thing helping him get his mind off her leaving is getting stinken drunk before passing out somewhere. But he stops before he does something regretful like, wanted to go running downstairs hoping she didn't leave to tell her to stay but he didn't and now he lying in bed looking at the picture on his nightstand of him and Robin on their honeymoon.

"I should have told you to stay. Why didn't I? Why didn't I go running after you after you when you left? Why do I have to be so stubborn and only think of taking her back when I can't have her leave her job. I love her but this new job will give her even less time with me and for us. Letting her go was a good thing? She needs to have her career and become more famous even if it kills me to not have her here right now." He's right, he thinks giving her the out was the right way to go and he respects her enough to let her make up her mind. Coming back home was great, he missed her the moment he left Argentina but he needs to let her go so they can both try to move on.

Robin finally goes back to her old apartment building. Not the one she had 11 years ago when she first moved here but the one she gave up to live with Barney in his fortress. This apartment was great and with her ever charming hot self she gets her apartment back once she asks if it's still vacant.

The apartment was still the same except it was empty and had a different color on the walls. It was now white and gray. Like another apartment she knows and didn't want to think about.

"Damn, I have to paint these walls back to only white. I can't have it looking like _his _(our old) apartment." She puts her stuff inside the bedroom to see that the walls are also the same colors as the living room. "Damn it. Who the hells loves gray so much?" She yells out in a heavy sigh putting her stuff down and going to the bathroom.

"At least the bathroom is white." She sighs again looking at her reflection in the mirror above the sink. At least that's still there too she thinks to herself.

Robin stands in front of the mirror and sees that her face is red and dry from crying earlier. "God, I'm such a mess. Why do I do this to myself?" That's her motto since she was a teenager going around Canada as Robin Sparkles it's something she never stopped thinking or acting on. It's her go-to reason for everything and now it's all about Barney. Why would one man do this to her? How could she give up everything she ever wanted and thought would last forever because of her selfish need to have a career more than a happy husband.

She reflects on her life, it's been like the wackiest, craziest thrill ride ever. She went from being a teenaged popstar to a wife over those seventeen years but somewhere in the middle she stopped believing in everything and start putting her needs ahead of others. Maybe it's because of her up bringing, her father raised her to be independent and fend for herself. But, her mother told her that life's scary without even needing to say the word SCARY. She never knew what she wanted or where she wants to go or be in her life. But, she does know one thing. That she will never ever stop loving Barney Stinson, ever since she see met him her life had become different. She realized that life can be crazy and fun but it can also throw you things that you think you might not want until you might lose it. Loving Barney and being loved by him is something she never knew or thought about in her life. Even when she met guys like Ted. It's always been something that instantly (and now seems forever) attracted to but also love more than she knew she was capable of.

He loved everything about her. Didn't he? It's something he once told her and she took that to mean something. It meant that he did love her, even the worst things about her that she hates herself for now. He loves her for her independent nature, for her love for friends and family, for her good heart, a cool, awesome attitude. He loves her for being her carefree self and taking the fun over the serious situations. And, maybe he even loves her crazy messed up (like him) mind. It's why they're soulmates and why they connect on so many levels. And, it's why she fell in love with him.

"Maybe, time is what needs to be right now. Lily told me once that if you have chemistry all you need is timing. But, the timing of it all is a bitch." She says out loud while staring at the mirror. Lily was right, I should give him time and space because maybe that's all he needs right now. He could come back to her again but for now being apart might be a good thing for both of them.


	5. I Will Try To Be

AN: I have decided for Robin to not take the Co-Vise President position because I feel like it will be too much for her to take on. Robin is so ambitious but with all the drama with Barney and her career taking over her life, I think it's best for her to either stay with WWN or move on to another network or a local news station as an anchor. At this point in her life she doesn't need to fall back to reporting, unlike the stupid pointless finale where she just reversed back to what she did in season 1. I again will never believe that finale was real because that was NOT who Robin Scherbatsky is.

This chapter is a lot of Robin and Barney's POV with a little twist. Hope you like it, I have been trying to figure out what to do and where to go with this but I think I have an idea. For now I will say that B/R do want to be together but the timing, once again is just not right. Enjoy!

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It's been 24 hours since she decided to not take the vise president position at World Wide News. In fact, they decided to go with someone else which was easier on making this decision on her own. She meets with her boss on this day to tell him she can't take the open vise president job but what she didn't know was that a new network was looking for a head anchor, the network/station was a new news network called News4you a single camera news network. It is only a daytime network with 24/7 world wide news. The network is looking for someone for the morning news which starts at 5am and lasts two hours. She would also have another position which is selling her face around the city, bus ads, TV commercials, magazine ads, radio stations etc. And also would be getting to produce the show along with the executive producer for the new network.

Robin was so excited to take this job that she said yes right when they asked her to interview for the position. Luckily though, she didn't have to interview because the woman who owns the new network knew her from her co-anchoring the World Wide News and loved her personality and on-air likability. So, Robin and her new boss Donna went out to lunch to talk about the new job. They instantly connected on everything, from their past backgrounds in the business to their personal lives. Donna had gone to Burkeley college where she studied business management. Then she went to NYU to study journalism. She grew up in Toronto and moved to New York to start school. Not to much later after that she gets an internship at FOX News working at night after school is over. Robin told her about growing up in Vancouver and why she came to New York. They both of similar backgrounds but Donna has a husband and a 3 year old son. Robin started talking about her career at first but then once it got to the subject she tried to avoid, she revealed to Donna about ending her marriage. Donna goes on to say "you have had such along career, you had started at the bottom but now you are at the highest you will ever be with your career. Having my family and making that work is why I'm happy with my life." She goes on to say that a career is great but a family and your friends is the best things in life. If you really don't want to end up alone you should tell your husband that. Robin goes on to say they are pending on a divorce. Donna interrupts her by saying "let him be for now, focus on your new job, even tell him that you have a new and better job. If you want to work on your relationship first face yourself, do you first than once you're satisfied you can decide what you want." The lunch went on for another half hour, Donna welcomed Robin to the new network and will be her co-executive producer along side her.

After lunch Robin called Lily but she didn't pick up. She wanted to tell her the good new news but she didn't pick up so instead of leaving a message she calls Barney hoping that he will be happy to hear the good news. The minute she called he picked up after two rings.

"Oh, Barney great you picked up." Robin said sounding excited about something.

"Hi, what's up?" Barney asked wondering why she sounds so giddy.

"Well, I didn't take that vise president position." She starts saying hoping Barney's listening to her. She always hated when he tunes her out ot doesn't listen to what she's saying. It was a problem they both tried to work on but in the last week of being on the road traveling he had enough and started to ignore whatever it was she was talking to him about.

"Why?" Barney thought for sure that she would take that job after they last talked. He finds it odd that she wouldn't take that job.

"No, let me change my words a bit. I didn't get the job, they took someone else, someone older and another man to take that position." She explains, Barney sighed kind of a bit happy to know she didn't get that job it meant she could possibly spend more time with him.

"Oh, okay. So why do you sound so giddy?" Barney asked trying to sound as interested as possible.

"I was accepted another job, this job is much more better than World Wide News. In fact WWN told them about me and things have changed. I am now working for a new network. New4You, it's an up and coming network that is premiering in the fall. I just met with the producer and executive for lunch we talked about the job and other things but most importantly she offered me a full time position as her co-executive producer and head anchor on the network. It's also a morning show, kind of like Come On Get Up New York but with less hours and more time for me." Robin wanted to say US but left that out because she didn't want to talk about that now and knows he won't talk about it so they don't.

"Oh, wow Scherbatsky that's great. So, why are you calling me?" He knows that sounds bad but he didn't mean it in a bad way he just thinks she can tell someone other than him about this.

"You are the only one I can talk to about my career. Yes we parted because of it but you always give me the advice I need to move forward and that's what I'm doing. I called Lily first but she didn't pick up, you are the only other person I can talk to that won't judge me or hold it against me." Robin sits down on her bed in her hotel after returning back to it just a few minutes before. She sighs and puts her purse and key to the room on the nearby nightstand then continues talking to Barney.

"I guess that's true." Barney wants to ask her to come over, he really misses her and wants to talk to her in person. There is a day, a moment, a week, a month that goes by where he doesn't want to stop talking to or thinking about Robin. "Sooooo," Barney started again and Robin listened "do you want to come over I can order some food and we can watch the Ranger game we recorded before our last trip and before we..." "Yes, I would love. Like to do that I'm free for the rest of the day." Robin was about to take a shower after talking to Barney so she tells him she needs to shower first.

They hang up soon after. Barney smiles brightly thinking that Robin will never be off his mind, he's always thinking about her, the way she always laughed at his ridiculous behavior, the way her eyes light up when she looks at him, the way she can get him going with just the sound of her voice or a light kiss to his mouth or cheek or anywhere else on his body. He thinks about their last fight, how he couldn't handle having her always be away working while he's alone working on his business blog. He updates on his original blog from time-to-to but can't find any reason to do so since the split. He's always thinking about Robin and what she's doing. He never thought that on the day they married they would be here three years later apart from each other when they never thought back on that weekend of their wedding, that they would end up separating and not speaking after. The day he left he knew he regretted leaving her. When Robin turned up on his door step the next day he never thought he'd see her again before that, but did and now he's sitting on his couch waiting for her to come over and fantasizing about picturing her in the shower right now washing herself. "Damn it, why does she do this to me?" It's like Scherbatsky will never leave his memory.

He thinks back to their wedding day and how happy they were standing up at that alter saying their own heartfelt vows to each other. He remembers placing Robin's wedding ring on her finger and she looking at him with tears in her eyes and a beautiful smile he seems to never stop remembering even now. Even when life had changed so drastically and so unfairly but he can't stop the way he feels about her every time he remembers little to big details of their lives since they met all them years ago. Before Robin came into his life he never thought she would be the one he'd marry or even have feelings for. Because then, Barney Stinson didn't do feelings. After Shannon he told himself not to get into another relationship cause he just couldn't do that anymore. It hurt him back then when Shannon left him but it was not the kind of pain he felt when Robin decided to pick another man over him or the day he left Robin after the Argentina trip. She will always be that girl he will never stop loving, never stop believing in and most importantly never stop thinking about. To the day he dies, he will remember her forever and remember why he fell in love with her in the first place.

At that moment his phone goes off and it shakes him out of his thoughts. He looks at the phone on the table in front of him and sees it's a incoming call from a private number. He doesn't know who it is but answers it after the third ring.

"Go for Barney." He says hoping this call wasn't something important.

"Hi, Mr. Stinson this is nurse Lindsey from the Belleview Medical Center." The news began. "Yes, this is he, what can I do for you?" He asked. "Um, Mr. Stinson I'm sorry to tell you this but your wife. Robin is here, she was in an accident. It wasn't serious but it was a 5 car pile up, one of the cabs that she was in was hit from the side by another vehicle. She's now in intensive care being treated." Before the nurse said anything he was out the door and down stars hailing a cab.

On the way to the hospital there was traffic, which annoyed and angered him more than anything. He needed to be there at the hospital to see her. See if she's okay, what exactly happened and why it happened. He was just so excited a few minutes ago to see her a few minutes ago and now she's in the hospital after getting into an accident. Why is his life so god damn messy?, Why can't he win for once?, why can't I have a normal life with the woman I love? These questions have been on his mind since he was a young boy hoping upon hope that one day he will meet his dad and have a special bond with him. Nowadays, he and his dad get along very well they are even best friends and he adores his fathers family even though he wishes that Jerry was there when he was growing up. And, now after all this time he really doesn't need his father, or his mother in his life and why he cut his family out of his life over the weekend of his wedding because of Robin. Robin is the only one who he needs in his life and now she's lying in a hospital with marks and bruises on her body.

"Come one, would you people hurry up I need to be some place." He yells, telling the driver to hunk his horn so they can get to the hospital.

Before he angers himself more he texts Lily and Marshall telling him about what happened hoping they get the texts. The traffic is moving a bit faster but still at a slow pace, he would get out and run but he just doesn't have the motivation or energy to run at his age so he sits patiently hoping nothing too bad happens to Robin. He hoped that she's okay, and isn't banged up too badly or relapses into a coma or something horrid like that. The traffic begins again and this time after sometime at a crawl moved beyond the traffic. The cab pulled up at the hospital entrance, Barney throws a $50 at him telling him to keep the change and runs out and into the hospital.


	6. Trying (Part 1)

**Trying Part One of Two!**

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They tried more than any two people can. They loved each other, the best way they knew by showing it. Showing that a day that goes by without a conversation: a phone call, text, email, face-timing anything that would give them a time to talk. But, that all changed when they got married... Barney thought that the only way to keep talking to Robin would be to marry her. Because when they met over a decade ago he never thought he would find someone who actually took him seriously. Robin always knew that she liked Barney, he reminded her of her first boyfriend but now after the divorce that all changed. Letting each other go again wasn't the smartest decision they made. Maybe it was for the best interests of their lone wolf exteriors, being in a relationship is hard, you have to make sacrifices and try things that may or may not work. But, they thought pushing all the selfish independent parts away so they can try making their relationship and marriage last. They loved each other enough to try?, it's what they did all along, for their whole life they never thought about getting to do the whole marriage thing. It was just not them... But that all changed on that cold December night in 2012

Maybe marriage wasn't the best for them, they were always very independent especially Robin and when they were on the heels of divorcing, which neither of them wanted when they got married. Was just a way to go back to the life neither of them wanted after marrying. Being single is who they are but love was stronger? Maybe the bigger problem is TRYING!

Trying too hard to fight against being together, trying not enough to tell each other how they really feel towards one another. Trying to put the other ones happiness above their own. Trying to understand the other ones mind when really they knew what the other one was thinking. Trying to make the marriage work when both weren't in a place where the marriage could be saved. Robin slowly pushing him away, Barney becoming too quiet and ignoring the things she had to say. Robin's career being the thing that kept them apart emotionally. The marriage started off wonderfully they went to Belize for their honeymoon and had the time of their lives soaking up everything that came with their honeymoon package. The first two months of newly-wedded bliss was blissful but then Robin went back to work and they asked her if she'd be up for taking the new open position as foreign correspondent. He was happy for her when she took the job, it had always been her dream to travel the world. With him not being at GNB anymore and trying to figure out what he wanted to do in his life. He thought going with her and traveling around the world would be "legen...wait for it... Oh right I don't have to wait anymore traveling would be awesome." He said before kissing her sweetly on the lips.

It was the dream to be with the woman of his dreams and to travel the world. He says he doesn't want to go anywhere but New York City, but since he has a lot of traveling hours left from his GNB days he thought he can take those hours and use them to travel. He's been to other countries before but that was all for business. Being with Robin, traveling and spending all his time with her was always the best times of his life. And then it got hard, she worked more and all the time he hoped she'd spend with him was spent at the office or in a hotel on a computer. It was slowly becoming stressful on both of them but to give up on each other and end the marriage wasn't something they thought would happen on the day they married.

Barney's pacing back and forth in the waiting room waiting to hear if Robin's okay. He had tried to see her but she was still badly banged up from the accident and was still being treated by doctors when he arrived at the hospital. The nurses told him to wait outside in the waiting area while they're treating Robin. It did to Marshall and Lily a half hour to get to the hospital and when they did they found Barney nervously pacing around the waiting room.

"Hey, how's she doing?" Lily asked as she hugged Barney. She noticed he was shaking and crying, she never saw him like that before it half freaked her out and half made her want to hold on to him for dear life. She didn't know how badly Barney was taking this divorce but didn't want to ask anything else that isn't important right now.

"She's being treated, I asked if I can see her but they needed to treat all her injuries first. I'm not sure how badly the accident was but it seems like it as pretty bad." Barney explains to Lily and Marshall exactly what happened earlier this day. That they were going to hang out and catch up with each other but then he got the call from the hospital and everything changed. Marshall and Lily both realize that their divorce isn't finalized yet which means he can still be marked as her husband so any rights they had as a married couple will still go to him and they didn't sign a prenup which was a good idea since both of them are very independent thinkers.

A nurse comes into the waiting area to find the three friends talking.

"Um, hi Mr. Stinson." She says and he stands hoping to hear good news.

"Yes, is my wi-f... Is Robin okay?" Barney asked with Lily holding his hand for support. He wanted to say wife but since they're divorce is still pending he switched it to Robin instead of his name.

"She's doing fine now but she was really banged up from the accident. She has a bandaged arm due to her being thrown against the door of the vehicle. She has a broken right leg, she might have to stay off her feet for a week, but the bruising should go away soon. When she first arrived here she couldn't feel her neck, the accident twisted her neck and her shoulder to pop. We had to pop her neck to get it back in lined with her head. Other than that, she's doing okay. You can go see her now." The nurse lead Barney, Marshall and Lily to Robin's room where Robin was lying down resting her eyes.

When she opened her eyes she saw the door opening to the room to see her almost ex-husband and her two best friends walking in. "Hey, guys what brings you here?" She joked but Lily only ran over and gave her a hug, gently so that she didn't hurt anything that was bandaged on Robin's body.

"I'm so glad you're okay, we were scared there for a moment." Lily says breaking her hug with Robin.

"It is great to see that you're okay and nothing really badly serious happened." Marshall stands on the other side of Robin's bed with Barney who was strangely silent while his two friends talked to Robin.

"It was bad at first but I was lucky to get out of it alive." Marshall cracked a joke about another miracle that happened in his life but Barney was surprisingly quiet for this conversation

Lily and Marshall stayed for another half hour and then had to leave to go pick up Marvin at Mickey's house. Ted and Tracy came by later in the day but before this Barney and Robin talked about their relationship...

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TBC/AN: This is a two part chapter, I wrote a lot for one chapter so I made this a two part chapter which I like more than an actual long chapter. I like short stories or stories that aren't as long it's why I read fanfiction rather than books. Anyway, hope you enjoyed this because the next chapter will be part two of this and the longest chapter of the story so far.

I want to create a little bit of drama before the good stuff comes later in the story. BR won't be getting back together they are just talking about their marriage and their pending divorce. I will explain later on just why I'm pending the divorce instead of making the divorce legal. But, for now I have a few ideas on how this story will go. Remember this is a BR-Robin gets Barney back story and it's the way she would be written it she wasn't so OOC in the last few episodes of the series.


	7. Trying (Part 2)

This chapter is a bit long, it has two parts to it. One in the beginning of the day and the other at the end of the day. This is all in one day but the day after Robin got into the accident.

Continued from last chapter!

This first part was supposed to be part of the last chapter but I kind of messed up where I was going with this. It will make sense at the end but I wanted to put in here something cute so it's a flashback to their wedding and his vows to her.

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_Robin, I know our relationship is messy but since the day I met you I never thought I'd fine someone who understands me. I never thought I would get married, it was never a need for me. But, when I think about what I need the only conclusion I thought of is you. You make me want to be a better person, a better man. A man you can rely on and who supports you in anything you do. I wouldn't be standing here today in front of all our friends and family if you weren't always there for me having my back in all the crazy, insane stunts I pulled. My crazy womanizing days (those days are over now), the days when I had nobody to lean on or get to know who I am and what I'm doing. To have a support system when nobody cares to take me seriously. You are always there and from this day forward I will always have your back like you had mine all these years. When I let a day pass without having you there, waking up in the mornings to your beautiful smile or going to sleep at night with you lying in my arms. Those times are always my favorite times of each day and from this day forward I hope we can get to do that forever. I learned something from my past mistakes and that is when I have something so important and that something makes all those mistake and past misgivings all the more amazing and that reason is you. The mistake I made all these years is never trusting myself enough to want a relationship or even trust anyone but with you I can trust in telling me the truth. But, when I lie know that it's out of love for you, you gave me meaning in my life and I'm trying the best I can to mean what I say when I say it._

_Loving you made me feel whole again and I realize now that I don't ever want to lose you._

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"Hey, come here." Robin says asking Barney to come closer to her so she can be next to him.

"What's wrong Barney?" Barney wasn't great with these kinds of stuff. Seeing Robin lying in this hospital bed just makes him scared that one day he'll actually lose her for good and not in a good way. He never thought he would see the day when Robin Scherbatsky left him. Not in the "I'm divorcing you way" but actually dying and leaving him forever. He hated thinking about this but it did accrued to him as he recited his vows on their wedding day.

Those last words pop into his head as he sits beside Robin as she holds his hand gently in his. He wanted to cry, he wanted to tell her that the divorce was a bad idea because he needs her in his life in more ways than he thought before when they were so happy and in love. Does that love still exist? Does she still love him? Does he still love her? The answer is yes. They do and as they held hands she started to tear up and then said "Are you okay?" He replies shaking his head "Yeah, I'm okay I was just thinking." She asks what about and he replies "nothing, it's nothing." He gives her a weak smile trying not to show how scared he really is to lose the only person, the only woman he ever truly loved and all because her job took over their happily married (they were happy weren't they?) with their life's.

"So... Tell me what's really wrong?" Robin asked wanting to know what's on Barney's mind and hopes to get a real honest response out of him.

"It's. It's that on the day I married you I thought I would never lose you and today that almost happened." This got her attention as she looks over at Barney who wasn't looking at her but at the window on his side of the bed.

"But, I'm fine, I'm here laying next to you alive." She replies in a soft tone. "Look at me Barney." He wasn't looking at her but when she asked him to look at her he did. She admits something to herself, she realized that Barney has this concerned/sad expression on his face and she knows that look all too well. He used that a lot when something's bothering or worrying him and sometimes (most of the time that look is directed at her) it always worried her and she knows why he's giving that look to her right now.

"I'm here, there's nothing to worry about." She holds him close to her and he lies his head on his shoulder. She gently brushes the back of his head with her free and not broken hand.

"I just. I was thinking about losing you Robin. I know we tried in our marriage but I'm regretting giving up on us. I know you love your career and the traveling but I miss having you around."

"I don't love my career Barney. I love my success but success isn't fulfilling. It's only something I like doing and always did but I don't love my job. I thought all the success I had was great before we got engaged and at first you knew I didn't want to take that foreign correspondent job. You told me to take it because it was my dream job. Yes, I loved working for World Wide News as correspondent but after we got married it wasn't the only thing I loved. I like doing my job but the reason I didn't take it at first was because of you." This shocked Barney, he knew that she was hesitant about taking the foreign correspondent job but she didn't know it had anything to do with her.

"Me? Why me?" He asked wondering what he had done to have her rethink taking the job.

"Because I was settled in New York, I had this great job. My career wasn't taking over my life and I was finally happy because I had you. I know choosing the correspondent gig was tough on our marriage but it didn't mean I stopped loving you."

"Wait, did you take the gig because you thought I wasn't happy or was it because you wanted to be happy when you weren't trying in our marriage?"

"That's not what I mean Barney. I meant that I wasn't going to take that job knowing where my life was at the time. I was happy with you, I wanted to stay I New York and then they promoted me again so I took it because it made us more money, because you left GNB I wanted to support us financially so I took the job hoping it wouldn't be so hectic or change anything about our relationship."

They are now sitting up on the bed talking about the last month of their marriage and why. Robin leaning back against the wall of the bed without moving her position due to her broken leg and arm. But then, Barney stands beside her bed without saying anything. He is now quiet and pacing as he was doing earlier.

"Why are you mad? I was telling you the truth when I said I would only take the job if you wanted me to. I was happy just being an anchor." She didn't know why he took this so personally she was taking this job so they can have a stead income due to him leaving GNB.

"I know you were but you didn't have to take another job if you were happy with your life here Robin. I quit GNB to protect you, I only left because I was done there. I was going to work for the FBI, they even offered me a position as a secret agent and I would have gotten paid for it. I turn them down to protect not only myself but your safety as well."

"Barney, I own a gun I'm a member of the NRA and I can kick anyone's ass. So, why are you so upset about me choosing to take a job I like? And most importantly why didn't you take the FBI gig that would've been fine. We don't have any kids or anything holding us back from doing something we're good at."

"I know you are, that's not the point I'm trying to make. I'm trying to tell you that I wanted to save the marriage but you said you were really stressed out do to your job. I gave you an out so you can be less stressed out and not have to worry about my life. I wanted to fix our marriage so I tried to but you pushed me away so I left to take the pressure off you. It had nothing to do with me not trying to save our relationship."

"You're changing my words around. I didn't ask you why we ended our marriage I asked you why you seem upset about the accident."

This argument lasted a while until Barney had enough and left. He wanted to tell her that he wanted to try to make this work. To make them work, he wanted to separate for a little bit not actually divorce her. She wanted the same but took the easy way out. Barney leaves the room to go outside to get some air when he spotted his brother in the hall. He had forgotten that he called him this morning to ask him if he's free on Saturday to hang out. Ever since Barney and Robin's split he was feeling a little lost so he ended up getting wasted at a bar in Queens where James and Tom live. That's when he called him with a drunken rant about how selfish Robin was being. He didn't remember that call until James reminded him the next day letting him listen to the message Barney sent him. Barney regretted that instantly he didn't mean the things he said about Robin and James knows the whole reason why they split up. It wasn't because they didn't love each other it just got so overwhelming and with the traveling it was just too much.

Barney liked the city life but when it comes to Robin he wants her to be successful and live the life she always wanted to.

"Hey, bro is Robin still here?" James asked as he walks over to his brother who was heading towards the exit.

"Yeah, she's upstairs in room 310." James noticed that Barney looked upset over something and wanted to ask why he's looking upset.

"Are you okay?" James asks knowing how upset his brother was about his divorce from Robin.

"Yeah, I'm fine she's upstairs and doing well. She should be released tomorrow." Barney said trying to leave this conversation behind so he can get some air.

"Okay, but you know I'm here for you when you need to talk right?" Barney nodded and James left to get a room key to go see his now ex-sister in law?

"I know, I'm just getting some air I will be back soon." Barney leaves and heads for the exit. He really wanted to go home but didn't get the courage to leave Robin even though they fought again.

"Hey sis-in-law." James announced as he entered Robin's room.

"Hey, James what brings you here?" Stupid question but she loved seeing James. They actually got pretty close when she and Barney got engaged and then married.

"I saw Barney downstairs he looked a bit upset about something." James didn't want to butt into any problem Robin and Barney was having but he had to ask why Barney looked so upset.

"Yeah, we kind of got into an argument." Robin was eating some jello as she was just finishing up her lunch so the company is greatly needed.

"What about? I know it's not my place but you and Barney kind of helped me through my breakup so I want to help fix whatever problem you have as way of giving back to you for helping me fix my family." Robin hated giving herself away, she didn't like anyone butting into her business but James is family to her so she ends up telling him the whole story starting from their Argentina trip and their pending divorce.

Barney comes back to the room 15 minutes later to see Robin and James chatting and laugh about something. This put a smile on his face, he actually loves seeing his two favorite people bonding. He hoped that would go on for years when he married Robin.

"Hey, guys what are you talking about?" Barney interrupts the bonding moment.

"Nothing bro, just chatting with my sister in law." Both James and Robin smile at this, it was sweet to see this happen. At least Robin can talk to James normally, Barney finds it nice but he wishes she'd just talk to him like a normal person would.

The three talked for another hour then James left. Barney decided to apologize to Robin while outside, he thought about why they decided to divorce but he didn't want to divorce her it made him cringe just thinking about that day when he really does lose her to something/someone. But, he didn't let that bother him or let it show. Robin accepted his apology and after that Barney did leave telling her he will pick her up tomorrow. It left Robin wondering about their relationship and if they could try saving it. She knew from James that Barney hadn't taken to the divorce in a good way and he told her that when he saw him at that bar on that night two months ago. She didn't know about him getting drunk at all nobody but James knew about this and when she found out it shocked her. Their split really messed him up, so bad that only days after returning to New York he was really messed up over it. She was too, it made her realize again that the divorce wasn't the best option for them.


	8. Confessions

I wanted to add a little bit more of Lily and Robin's friendship to this so in this chapter Robin is out of the hospital and recovering at M/L's new house in Queens. Marshall had taken a new job as a county court judge and was loving it. The finale had Marshall back in a corporate job that he seemed to not like and Lily is not pregnant at this time but I will have them have another baby but not YET. Lily is currently still an art consultant but in New York and the surrounding areas. Barney's created his own business a while back, while he and Robin were married... It's an online advice column where he gives men and now women advice on relationships and daily life opinions. But, what he actually does for a living now is writing so I wanted to incorporate what he wrote with the Bro Code and The Playbook in this and is currently working on a relationship guide for men in marriages. Yes, he started this when he was married...

If you have read the finale blog post from Barney Stinson on his actual blog you'll know he's perfectly happy with his new marriage and is in a good place.

Long chapter!

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Ever since Robin was okay to be released from the hospital Lily insisted for her to come live with her and Marshall until she's fully recovered. Robin didn't want to intrude on their lives but they both insisted it's fine. She moved in only a day after she was released from the hospital. But this time it wasn't an inconvenience or like living in hell like she was that time she went to live with them in Long Island disliking everything about it. But, this new house is much closer to the city and to her job which she appreciates her friends for taking her in and helping her recover. The accident wasn't the bad but she still has a broken leg and a lot of bruises that hasn't healed yet. While Marshall's at work Lily takes it upon herself to take care of Robin which has become a bit Lily-fined with her doing anything and everything Robin asked or didn't ask of.

"I appreciate your help Lil but you don't have to do that." Lily was currently trying to fluff up her pillows to make it more comfortable for Robin but it's becoming an issue which Lily was getting mad with. She wanted the pillows to be perfect and comfy for her friend which is a nice gesture but it's getting more annoying now so she thinks Lily needs to relax a bit.

"I just want you to be comfy and those pillows and your position lying on the bed is making it difficult to watch you twist and see your discomfortable face. I just want you to be comfy that's all." Lily smiled lightly at her friend and a minute later Robin's had enough and stops Lily from trying to get her to feel better.

"Just stop and take a break you've been taking care of me since I got here and you look tired from not only taking care of me but taking care of Marvin and Daisy too. Take a break." Robin demanded and Lily obliged stopping what she was currently which was fixing Robin's comforter.

"Fine, I'm done anyway." Lily sat down on the bed and Robin sighed with relief of not feeling suffocated with her friends constant baby sitting ways.

"So, talk to me you haven't said a word all day." Robin had noticed Lily's quietness and it's been worrying her to the point where she gets angry with Lily fussing over her trying to make everything comfortable or nice for her liking.

"What about? I'm fine." Robin gives Lily this look that says she isn't fine. "Really than why haven't you talked to me at all today?" Robin was worried that something was going on with Lily but Lily's quietness and ignorance has been the more annoying thing since she moved in. The first week it was okay, Lily made sure that Robin was okay and taking care of on a daily bases. She didn't have a lot of work going on lately, with Marshall at work everyday and the art world not being as hot as it was a year ago. Lily has not been happy being a stay at home parent, now that Marvin is in school it has become a bit lonely in the house. However since Robin moved in she finally wasn't just a mother or a wife she was happy having her friend to rely on her. That hasn't happened in months, now Lily is just trying to help her friend recover from the accident but didn't seem happy today.

"Okay, so tell me what's wrong I know that look?" Robin has known her friend for along time and knows what something's up with her and thinks it's something possibly serious because that quietness has become serious at least with Robin.

"It's nothing." Lily starts off saying than stops taking a deep breath and then looking down at the floor about to cry but doesn't and keeps her emotions to herself. Robin taught her that and it works anytime she needs to cry and not let anyone see it. "I guess I've been lonely lately, with Marshall always working he never has anytime for me anymore and now Marvin's in school and growing up faster with each day. I feel like my life has gone down the crapper lately and I'm a bit sad about that. This time two years ago I would have thought I would be a stay at home wife and mom." Lily had been holding this inside for along time and is only now talking about it. Robin knows that she didn't want to be in this place, Lily was always much stronger than her at knowing what she wants out of life. Recently they both had been so lost in their lives they forgot how to live their lives like they used to.

"I get that, I thought that the day I decided to get married was the day my life was completed. Barney was the only thing I knew I needed in my life at that time so saying yes to his proposal was the best decision I had ever made. I had the love of my life and a blossoming career and now look at me.. I'm lying in your guest bedroom recovering from an accident. Not only that but I had it all before I (Robin shows her left hand to Lily) threw the only thing I thought could love me away for the life I once lived before and was never happy with. I had a wonderful career and loved traveling but regret with all my mighty throwing away my marriage." This was also another confession that Robin had been holding inside since Barney left her in Argentina. It was the wrong decision and she hated herself for letting him leave her without talking.

"Wow, I didn't know you were feeling that way about Barney. I know this isn't my place but as your best friend I have to ask. Why in the world would you throw your happiness away so quickly for your job?" Lily has had this conversation with Barney a week ago.

"_So, how is Robin doing?" Lily had called Barney up to tell him that Robin was staying with them in their new house wanting Barney to know that he doesn't have to take care of Robin like he had wanted to. This was a promise to Robin before Lily asked Robin if she would PLEASE stay with her out of being a bored lonely house mom._

"_She's doing better, she can be released tomorrow." Barney was so happy that Robin was okay and back to normal minus the scrapes and bruises all over her legs and arms and her face still had some marks from the accident as well. But, he was so glad that Robin was leaving the hospital and was excited for her to come live with him until she recovers._

"_That's great. Listen, I just talked to Robin and I asked her if she can come recover at my house and she said yes. I wanted to ask you if it's okay for me and Marshall to take her in that way you won't have to do the heavy handed stuff plus I'm alone a lot these days so having some company is good for me." Barney knew that Lily and Marshall were having some marital frustrations due to him working all the time and was not happy being home alone doing nothing all day._

"_Robin said yes to both of us isn't that weird? Anyway, yeah I guess it's okay for you to take her in for a while I know how difficult it is for you and Marshall right now." Lily had to ask him something before they hung up and this was going to get asked the day of the accident but Barney was not in a good place that day for her to ask so she'll ask now._

"_Before I let you go, I wanted to ask you something."_

"_Sure, what is it?"_

"_You and Robin, be honest with me Barney what really went on with you and Robin in Argentina and why are you getting a divorce after years of being in love with her and wanting to be with her?"_

_This took a minute for Barney to think about it wasn't an issue for him anymore and he doubts Robin's regretting the divorce since the last conversation they had was him walking out due to another fight just like their Argentina fight._

"_Yeah, Lil I'd rather not talk about this right now and certainly not with you." Barney's response was not what Lily wanted to hear so she took another step for the answer._

"_No, you are going to talk about this Barney I'm your friend and I thought you and Robin were happy so damn it would you tell me what went wrong. I love you both but you two are the most stubborn people I've ever known. Just talk to me." Barney sighed on the other end of the phone hating how Lily could break him down and get him to share his deepest inner most thoughts, it has always been like that between them it's so annoying but he gives in every time._

"_Fine, she's the one who wanted the out not me. She had become frustrated with work and the travel, it was putting our relationship at risk so she took the easier route for the both of us. I never wanted a divorce Lily, she was and still is my whole world but I never wanted it. She thought it would be easier and less stressful on me so she asked and I being the good respectable husband that I am took the out so she could be happy. We were both miserable and unhappy with the traveling, I missed being in New York, I did like going different places but New York is my home and I thought it was Robin's home too." Barney, luckily for him he was on the phone so Lily couldn't see him tearing up about this confession. This whole situation was still eating at him making him mad every time he thinks about it or about Robin and how close he came to actually really losing her._

"_Oh, wow I'm now regretting asking now. But, before I hang up you should talk to Robin and tell her how you feel I know she still feels those regrets too. I know she loves you Barney, I had never seen her happier the day you two got married. Fix it. Bye Barney!" Lily hangs up and Barney gets to thinking about how ridiculous it was to throw away his marriage and happiness and wonders is Robin regrets ending things too._

* * *

"Wait, Barney said that he regrets giving up on us?" Robin listened to what Lily just told her and was in shock because she thought that Barney didn't care about their marriage or saving what they thought they wanted for something so petty like her job.

"Yes, again this isn't my place but like I told him I know you two love each other and have seen you both go through too much shit to have it thrown away without a care in the world. You were so happy on your wedding day. So why would you want to throw away happiness after years of running and fighting for each other?" Lily had a point, Robin hated her for always being honest and blunt with her. It was always that way since the day they met all them years ago.

Lily leaves Robin's room which got Robin thinking about things. She really messed up this time, she hated that Lily was right about her being selfish and not talking things through with Barney before throwing it all away. She was happy on her wedding day, she was happy being married officially to Barney. Mrs. Stinson people had started to call her which was awkward at first but really nice to hear. She was Mrs. Barney Stinson something she never thought she would ever hear anyone utter to her or even think about being called. Before getting to be Mrs. Barney Stinson she would complain about his willing to commit to anything and wondered if she's the same way. Which they are, she would run, cry, have major breakdowns over for a whole half a year. She had thought at one point that she was pregnant with his child which turned out to not be true in a very devastating way. It took her months to confess to Barney that she couldn't have kids. Not only that but she couldn't have HIS kids, the two beautiful suited up boy that looked the splitting image of Barney and the beautiful brunette girl who looks so much like her it's uncanny. It took along time to recover from that shock but longer to realize that Barney is that weakness for her. Barney's the only one who could make her feel anything, you know less like a robot, the one who was her friend in her music video?. He was that person, the first person who actually got her to open up and share personal things with.

He was the only one she ever felt save and protected with, the only one who took her lives interests with respect and even told her once that he thinks it's an awesome way to look at someone's life. Her life, the only life she knew of until she opened herself up to the real thing. The real thing that everyone around her would constantly throw in her face. Love. She never felt that emotional pull towards anyone until she met Barney all those years ago at MacLaren's. She was truly smitten with just seeing him across the room with his friend Ted. She thought Ted was nice but all she wanted to do was get laid that pretty blond man in a suit who she thought was cute would have done the trick. But, then she got to know him and she found someone who shared the same views on life and that bond of unlikely friendship grew into a lifetime of love.. Love that she never knew existed but not enough to actually want what her friends Lily and Marshall have.

Barney changed on that and that's got her to say the next thing that came out of her mouth.

"Lily, I need your help."

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I hope you enjoyed this chapter it came very easy for me to write I just had this idea and ran with it. I have a plan for Robin to win back Barney with Lily's help and I think it's a pretty good idea.


	9. Forever With You

This story is ever changing but it hasn't lost the premise of what I've been telling. In the next couple of chapters you'll find out how Robin will win Barney back and why she wants to be with him again.

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Barney was asleep in his bed at his new apartment. He had decided to sell his fortress because it reminded him of Robin and the life he thought they would forever have together. A life HE and Robin wanted, at least that's what he thought when he wanted to sell his fortress when they were engaged. Selling the only place he called home, his shelter, his place to hide out from the world and just be alone with his thoughts and feelings because being alone is the only thing he new he could do best. That all changed when he realized he needed to stop playing around and get Robin back for good. He thought that being happy and alone was all he knew but that all changed because of Robin. When she agreed to marry him and told him she was his forever, and wanted to be. It made him happy, for the first time ever his eyes were wide open to the possibility that Robin still loved him like he loved her.

That night on the roof of World Wide News was the best most relieving night of his life. When Robin Scherbatsky, the only woman who could literally throw his heart all around his chest and would get him to smile whenever she walks in a room. This woman he thought he could be with for the rest of his life, the only woman who ever loved him for who he is. At least that's what he thought when he decided to propose to her and she accepted. This night, they just stood there on top of that building where Robin loved to just get away from the world and have some peaceful moments. They just held and kissed each other until they were too frozen to even move. They were both freezing that night but their smiles and tears made them both warmer. Having her back and in his arms where he thought she would be forever when she said yes to hi... He thought it meant something to her, to him and their future together. He told her!

"I want to spend forever with you and only you." He whispered that in her ear as he held her from behind kissing her hair.

She said "I want that too. Forever with you." This was apart of her wedding vows to him and those words stuck.

He thought FOREVER meant something and their relationship was solid. Wasn't it? He asks this question a lot to herself for along time before they got back together and got married, and then again after he took the out. But that all changed when she asked for that "out" while that was shocking to him it really threw him the morning he returned to New York without Robin by his side happy to be home again. After Argentina went horrible wrong he went back to being in denial for along time. Until that afternoon when he got that phone call that Robin was in an accident.

But, that was then and this is now. Barney's phone rang with a text message telling him that Lily wants to meet with him later. You know? To catch up and hang out for a little while. Robin and Lily had planned a way for Robin to talk to Barney. Not only talk about their relationship but there's a surprise waiting for him. If he agrees to it.

Barney returns a reply with "ok" and goes back to sleep.

* * *

"You think this will work Lil?" Robin was nervously pacing Lily and Marshall's living room nervous about what will be going on in two days. She would be either going on her way to Hawaii by herself or would go with Barney. This wasn't the main reason she was nervous Lily helped with this plan and so her best friend put on a smile and tried to calm her down by giving her a pep talk and a hug by saying "it will all work out, he will agree to this." Robin hoped Lily was right cause if this goes wrong and he does agree to it... She can lose Barney all over again. And this time for good.

"He will go with you. You two need to go away together and have some time alone to talk and get everything out in the open. If he agrees to marrying you again that will be his answer to your question. He really does still love you Robin. I know he will agree to this and if he doesn't than he's the biggest idiot in the world but meaningfully so." Robin knew this was the last chance she will have to tell Barney all the things she's been hiding for along time. Not just recently, but since their wedding day and the reasons why she wanted an out. It wasn't because she stopped loving him, he's the one for her, the only one. He's the love that she can't ever seem to shake. He's always there, in her mind everyday of her life... Those words Barney once said to her when she was dating Nick came back to haunt her nightmares.

"This woman has a hold on my heart that I couldn't break if I wanted to." He said their relationship was humbling and painful but also wonderful. She had taken that to mean something then, she still remembers almost kissing him and telling him he wants him back that night. She had been thinking about him for a while and she couldn't shake him, couldn't get him off her mind if she tried. He has this hold on her that doesn't ever seem to break. That tight but safe hold, the one he held her with that night he proposed and the nights after that.

Robin used to think she didn't need anyone or want to be tied to another person for the rest of her life. She didn't want commitment because she knew there would be heartache behind it. But, on that cold December night in 2012 she let her heart stop beating for a second to open her eyes to see Barney Stinson kissing her and holding her closer. Being with him was the only thing that mattered in that moment. That memory will never ever go away and now she has to fight for him. Fight for the love she kept running from before they were engaged. Because she can't lose him again, not to another woman or anything else. She needs Barney Stinson in her life, from now until forever even if it takes some begging on her part. She wants to always be Mrs. Stinson for the rest of her life without any regrets or meaningless moments there are, she knows he's hers forever.

She hopes and prays (she's not the biggest prayer or believer) but she as hell isn't going to lose the only person she ever truly gave her heart to. Her soul mate. She used to think that he was her soul mate, she still thinks he's the One and only soul mate she's ever had. She married this man who she met in a bar all them years earlier who's her soul mate, her best friend, her teammate, her everything. He's her whole life and letting him go without saying anything in hopes that he would not take the out, his answer was not what she thought would be the day she married him.

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Next chapters: Later on, B/R will be back together after the next chapter and they will be happy. But, nothing's all fluffy rainbows and butterflies they will have their problems but will work them out together. You know like a normal, in love couple do? So enjoy the fluffy for now it's cuteness.


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